Detours.

Detours. How I hate them.  They take WAY longer than a normal route. They cause confusion and frustration because I am no longer in a familiar place. They create traffic which I H.A.T.E. with a passion.

Plus, there never seems to be anyone actually working on the road that they are shutting down- so why make us detour???

Pause there- if anyone out there works on the roadways; I have two thoughts for you.

1st- I’m extremely thankful for you. Anytime I drive one of the bridges by Sagemont that seem to be taller than a skyscraper, I always have a moment of awe that the bridge could be built while simultaneously experiencing a moment of terror that the bridge was built.  I’ve seen what happens to Lego towers when they’re not attached quite right….

2nd- Could you please explain why it seems permissible to put out "Road Closed" signs 6 ½ months before any human ever starts to work on that road? Please tell me there’s a reason- if nothing else, that it’s a plot to put the entire city of Houston into a traffic gridlock… oh wait…Houston already is. I answered my own question.

Anyways... 

Suffice it to say, I dislike detours.
And all that comes with them.

I’ve recently talked with friends who are job searching. I hear from friends who have surprising new obstacles at work. I listen to friends who have encountered unforeseen trials. I know friends who are in the middle of major life decisions. And the list goes on and on…. Life’s detours.  How we hate them just like, (or most likely), more than road detours.

I don’t know about you, but I have my life plan and goals. So when something happens that detours me off that plan, I’m NOT happy. Why should I be? The plans are good. They aren't dishonoring to God…. And just like road detours, life detours cause HUGE delays and are frustrating and confusing. So answer me this, if my end goal is to work for a church and help further God’s kingdom, why did I have to wait for 2 years after grad school until I arrived here? If I wanted to be married, why did I have to wait until I’m 28 to find the right man?

Or maybe your questions sound like this…if I want to be a nurse overseas, why do I have to go to nursing school and then work three years in America first? If I want to teach 2^nd grade, why do I have to spend my first year teaching Kindergarten? If I simply want to find a job so I can pay my bills, why have I been searching and applying for months without any offers? If I want to have children, why am I infertile? If I love volleyball, why can’t I make the school team?

We all have our questions. We all have experienced our road blocks… our detours to life’s goals.  And most of us have been confused. Maybe a little frustrated. Hurt. Annoyed. Angry.  And weary…always weary of the detours…

Why do we have to get caught in “life’s traffic” before arriving to our dream destination? Why do we have to be pointed onto a new road, one of unfamiliar surroundings and surprising twists & turns?

If we strip away the other questions, we are left with this one simply query:

Why doesn’t God follow our plans... our “map”?

Reading it that way makes me cringe a little. 

Do I really want God to follow my plans when He has so clearly told me:

 Your eyes saw my unformed substance;
in your book were written,
every one of them, the days that were formed for me,
when as yet there was one of them..*

For MY thoughts are not your thoughts,
neither are your ways MY ways, declares the Lord.
For as the heavens are higher than the earth,
so are MY ways higher than your ways and MY thoughts than your thoughts...**

YOU number my wanderings,
put my tears into Your bottle, are they not in Your book?...
This I know, because God is for me.***

Hearing that God has planned out my days before I was even born, with plans that are immeasurably higher than mine, I never have to doubt that He has led me down a closed road. I never have to wonder if he sees how many tears I cry on my detour…He has collected each teardrop. My “wanderings” are numbered by Him…they are ordained by Him.

At the end of the day, I am learning to trust that

My detour is actually the path.

How?

Because this I know…God is for me.

* Ps. 139:16

** Is. 55:8-9

**Ps. 56:8-11

Worst advice ever.

Since it’s May and that means all types of graduations and life changes, I thought I would share with you some advice that is extremely popular that I have found very UN-helpful. 3 little words that cause more heartache than possibly any other sentence out there …

No it’s not a mistake. Follow your heart is quite possibly the worst advice I’ve ever received (except for being told that the Freshman 15 doesn’t actually happen)!

But what?! How could following your heart be so awful? That just means that you’re following what you love and not letting anyone get in your way! How can that possibly end badly, right?!

Wrong.

That’s what we wished happened.

Let’s break this down.

My heart….

I don’t know about you, but some days, my heart leads me to eating 4.6 slices of pizza. Some days my heart leads me eating cookie dough for breakfast. Some days my heart leads me to watch 14 chick flicks in a row. Some days my heart leads me to believe my friends instead of my loving parents. Some days my heart leads me to believe the voices in the hallway that tell me I’m not worth anything. Some days my heart leads me to believe I’m ugly. Weird. Rejected. Unwanted. Or maybe my heart leads me to believe that I’m perfect. Gorgeous. Popular. Always right. Better.

Our heart is fickle and unreliable. It will draw us to cookies instead of spinach… (so does my taste buds- that one’s not all on the heart). It will draw us to good AND bad influences- whichever feels better in the moment. It will blind our eyes and numb our minds to the truth. All in the name of “following your heart”.

Jeremiah, a prophet of God in the Old Testament, nailed it when he said*:

“The heart is more deceitful than all else and is desperately sick; who can understand it?”

It’s true. My heart is wicked. And I can definitely see why he asks the question- “who can understand it?”

Disagree? How about this- ever been prideful? Jealous? Judgmental? Arrogant? That’s not exactly the emotions that I want my heart to follow- yet I do…frequently.

Ever questioned your worth? Your value? Your point in life? That’s actually not the “heart” that most people are advising you to follow when they tell you that advice.

Or what about his question- “who can understand it?”  Girls, are you really going to try to convince yourself and then me that we understand our emotions? HA! We all know that there has been at least one commercial that we have cried at for no reason. Or at least one lash of anger to someone who didn’t deserve it. Or at least one time in our life when the guy asks us “What’s wrong?” and we have to honestly say “I don’t know...”

So if “follow your heart” is ridiculously awful advice, what can we follow??

Glad you asked- here are some options for you to consider:

1. Your brain.

God gave you a brain- surprisingly enough, it’s more dependable than your emotions. If the guy you want to date because he’s cute has dated 4 other girls in the past 5 days…. THINK about the consequences- don’t imagine how it will FEEL to hold his hand.

2. Godly counsel- parents, pastors, good friends

God put the people in your life for a reason, and if you have a godly family, a student minister, or good friends their counsel counts. If the people who love you most, see major red flags with your “heart’s decision” see number 1.

3. God.

This seems obvious, since it’s the most important, but often we completely forget His Word. Or ignore it. And yet in reality, it is the trump card.

James 1:5 fills us in on this promise:

But if any of you lacks wisdom, let him ask of God, who gives to all generously and without reproach, and it will be given to him.

Granted, every once in a while God asks us to step out in faith and make a decision that our brain doesn’t always compute, or a decision that our circle of influence doesn’t understand, but when He asks that of us, He makes it very certain to you. Don’t turn that into an excuse to “follow your heart,” however, because those are very different things. The longer you spend in prayer and the Word, the better the outcome will be. And most of the time, when God is the leading factor, numbers one and two fall into place behind Him.

So, to wrap up - am I saying that you never make a decision
 because it makes you happy? No!

Am I saying that anytime you are drawn to something,
you should immediately run away? No!

I am saying this- when you want to follow your heart, check it by ALSO following the three things above.

The bottom line is this:

 Follow God’s heart. For his heart is love and his will is beautiful….

So we have come to know and to believe the love that God has for us. God is love, and whoever abides in love abides in God, and God abides in him… Do not conform any longer to the pattern of this world, but be transformed by the renewing of your mind. Then you will be able to test and approve what God's will is--his good, pleasing and perfect will.**

*Jeremiah 17:9

**1 John 4:16 and Romans 12:2 

Facebook Criminals.

We are surrounded by criminals…. Facebook criminals that is.  Don’t act shocked; you know what I’m talking about. 

The Happily Perfects, The Documenters, and The Repeaters.

1. The Happily Perfects:

The Facebook friends who are happy and gushy about everything.

 ALL. THE. TIME. 

Every day. Every second. Every post. But why wouldn’t they be happy all the time because their life is p.e.r.f.e.c.t.

“A bad hair day” is foreign phrase in their world. In pictures, their eyes never blink, their smile is never forced, the camera never gives them 15 chins, and their clothes never make them look like they gained 847 pounds.

Their life is always moving forward as they planned, or even better than they planned. They “bump into” famous people in the store and become best friends; they get 4 promotions in one month; they don’t have a “to do” list because everything is always already done.

Happily Perfects. I get depressed just thinking about them.

2. The Documenters:

These are the friends who document every part of their life. We know their breakfast, lunch, dinner, and every snack in between. They give us peeks into their closets, their cabinets, their laundry room, and their cars.

We know what pen they used to write a letter with; we know what test they had at 9:42am; we know what song is in their head and what the album cover looks like of the CD it came from.

It's what they do because it's who they are. 

We know their life activities because they are... 

The Documenters. 

3. The Repeaters:

The individuals who are passionate about 1 thing in life, a week or two at a time.  The ones who find 15 different ways to say the same thing within 2 minutes. The ones who, upon pausing for a mere 0.7 seconds, you already know what the rest of their status will say, and what their picture will be. How? Because they posted it 3 minutes before, and 22 times the day before.

The world of Facebook has no misunderstanding, confusion, or doubt about what The Repeaters care about. Because they have repeated it. Again and again and again………………. Oh and again. And Again. And again again.

The level of passion they have is admirable

 and unimaginably persistent. 

The Repeaters.

So once again, I tell you, criminals are all around us.

Yet, as I kept thinking about these “crimes”, I couldn’t help but begin to ask myself this instead-

"Holly, Why can’t you be happy for the Happily Perfects instead of bitterly jealous of their life right now? You don’t know their background or their future- let them enjoy their moments.

Instead of being annoyed by the life stories of the Documenters, why not be encouraging of their query to get the most out of life and share the adventures with others along the way?

And last, but not least… why not listen to the Repeaters? If it’s that important to your friend, it should be that important to you.

I started asking myself those questions,

because there’s something I didn’t say before…

 I have become one of them.

I’m sorry, but it’s true!! And now that the dark side has won me over, I’m realizing, there’s a reason for each “crime” being committed. If you’re my Facebook friend, you will already know which one has seduced me in…. I am now a Repeater.

BUT- I do have good reason! Allow me a brief moment to present my case.

Thanks to a dear friend of ours, we were told about a contest, that upon winning, would send Aaron and I for an all-expense paid trip to New York City for a weekend. BUT GET THIS- we would get to attend a rehearsal of the Tony Awards!!!! And be escorted to and from in a limousine!!!

For some of you, who are like I was before marrying  my husband, the Tony Awards sounds exciting, but almost equally exciting is the idea of the limo ride through NYC! Regardless of the reasons, the trip would be amazing!!!

I’m becoming a Repeater because we can vote once an HOUR through next Friday. Annoying? Absolutely. Worth trying? Without question.

So, I’m posting, and reposting “gentle” reminders to vote for my husband when you think about it…and even when you don’t. J

Aaron will kill me for what I’m about to say- but here’s the bottom line...

My husband is the most dedicated, generous, and loyal man I know. He truly lives to serve, and finds joy in doing so. 

His life has touched thousands of others, and all for the better.

Broadway, and all it entails- the music, the acting, the stage, and the stories- 

 resonates in the core of Aaron. 

God has created Aaron to be a musical theater genius, and 

He has given Aaron the talent to be a 

 brilliant director and beautiful performer.

To win this trip would be a dream come true, and I would love to help him live that dream. 

But I can’t do it alone. I need your help.

So please, help me give Aaron a trip of his dreams by voting and asking others too as well… I would be forever thankful!

Here is the link to the contest: www.newyork.com/ultimatefancontest

And the picture you are looking for:  

 Thank you- and next blog will be back to "normal topics", I promise!!

 ***But I reserve the right, to post a reminder to vote. :) #takehimtoBroadway