Future Days. Past Memories.

Future Days. Past Memories.

Check out the loads of awesomeness taking place in the Brown home in the upcoming days:

•  Aaron’s first production of the new school year opens tonight!!!!  Into the Woods starts at 7:30 and I’m SO excited about it. Come out this weekend or next to Dawson High!

• My 30^th birthday is Saturday! Wait, what? My 30^th birthday?!?!?! How did I get to this point? How am I more than TWICE the age of some most of the girls in my youth ministry?!?!?! Let’s move on.

• We go to Disney World on Sunday.  The last time I was there was when I was a baby. I have no memories of it. So excitement is OFF THE CHARTS.

• Our 1 year anniversary is a week from Sunday!!!!  Seriously. 1 year.  How did that happen?

How great is the next 14 days, right?!?!

As I was looking at our calendar last night and this morning, I started getting excited and sentimental all at the same time.  This past year, these past 10 years, really, have been an eclectic set of experiences and life changes, and yet, on the eve of a new decade (Ugh. Agh.) I can see God’s hand was directing the moves, the lonely nights, the hard conversations, the “random” jobs… the life that I have lived thus far.

So, as a new chapter in my life starts, I decided to write down the lessons that if I could, I would tell the younger me, the me that 15 years ago, couldn’t wait to get started with living her great big adventurous life.

Boys won’t call for a while. Get used to it.
Marriage won’t happen for what feels like eternity.  Endure the lonely.

I was a “late bloomer”, an “intimidating college student”, a “strong young woman”… whatever phrase you want to use that means “She won’t be asked on dates much.” There were nights that was really hard to deal with. And nights that was extremely hard to deal with. And a few nights that was relatively easy to deal with.

And yet, if I could change all that and be Miss Popular, the Homecoming Queen, or even just simply a girlfriend several times, I wouldn’t.  Looking back, I’m so glad God gave me the dating life He did and the strength that I needed to endure.  I’m thankful I didn’t date much, and I’m even more thankful I was able to keep the standards high for what felt like y-e-a-r-s of my life. Oh wait. It was years of my life. My husband was and is worth every teardrop that was shed. Every lonely Friday night. Every “missed opportunity”.  Every part of the wait.

So girls- since I can’t tell “young me”, let me encourage you- don’t give up in the waiting.

Just because you’re not the girl who wins “most dateable” doesn’t mean you are the girl who is “least desirable.”

Your wait will be worth it as well. I promise you. And looking back, I can now appreciate all the heartache that I didn’t have to experience because I didn’t date much. I’m so thankful for that.

Don’t drop one of your standards each year as a birthday present to yourself each year you’re single on your birthday.  Before you know it you’ll be down to “Breathing” and “Under 50”.  The good news is that you will find dates that meet those standards, but the reality is that you will also find a heart full of regret.

You won’t be a millionaire by the time you’re 25.  In fact, you’ll still be paying student loans off. And your car off. And your textbooks off. And your shopping decisions like you absolutely had to have all 17 pairs of shoes with matching shirts today.

People who become CEO’s, CFO’S, COO’s, and everyone other acronym with a “C” and an “O” in it by the time they are 30 are the MAJOR EXCEPTIONS and not the rule.  Set realistic standards for yourself.  You are NOT a failure when you turn 25 because you are still making under $40,000, or you still haven’t ended world hunger, or you still haven’t hit 1,000,000 followers on twitter.   

BUT at the same time- get off your rear and do something. Working a part-time job for 6 hours in a work-week, and watching Full House re-runs for the other 34 hours that you should be working, job-searching, or doing something productive with your time, is not an acceptable way of life for a normal healthy 25 year-old.  I get it, the job market is difficult.  So find a productive hobby, volunteer at your favorite organization, help serve in your church, or train for an Ironman!

Don’t give up on your dreams- be patient with them.

A sweet and dear friend sent me a text this morning reminding me that two of my heroes, Joseph and David from the Old Testament were both around 30 before their “careers” began. Joseph goes from being a slave to being the 2^nd in command in Egypt- a world superpower at the time. David goes from being a shepherd to the King of Israel and “God’s Man”. I think it’s safe to say that God can still use me.  If that wasn’t enough, Jesus Christ, my Savior, didn’t start HIS ministry until around the age of 30 as well.

So my young friends- frustrated with where you are in life? Been there. Not knowing why doors aren’t opening yet? I understand. Begging God to let you pursue the passion He’s put on your heart? Did that.

And you know what? One day, the door will open. The life circumstance will swirl upside down. The passion will become a possibility. Patience is not easy, but it’s needed.

Last, marriage will far exceed some of your hopes and greatly miss some of your dreams.

This pin on Pinterest makes me laugh.

First of all- what grown man likes a sleep over? Go ahead and ask your husband-to-be “Babe, do you want to stay up late, paint my fingernails, talk about chick flicks, and eat cookie dough?... Every single night for the rest of our lives???”

I can already tell you his answer will be: No. Absolutely not. Ha! Hahahahahahaha!

Or something along those lines.

Girls, be honest with yourselves, if that’s your ideal of marriage, you are in for a massive shock. At one point in my life, that’s where I was at. Thank God that He didn’t let me get married at that moment…. Aaron would have been sleep-deprived, working a second job at a nail salon, and 50 pounds heavier from cookie dough.

Here’s the truth: Aaron doesn’t gaze into my eyes every night and quote poetry to me. He doesn’t place my hands over his heart and tenderly tell me all the ways that his heart beats faster at the sight of me every night when he comes home. We don’t live in a romantic drama. We live in reality.  Every successful marriage does.

If your dreams of marriage are based on books and movies, I beg you to go have some serious conversations with women who have been married longer than 3 months. They will tell you that marriage rarely looks like what you are dreaming, but marriage can be far greater than what you imagine.

When two Christians are married and committed to God and His version of marriage, it requires constant effort but the pay-off is intimacy that a movie can’t capture. Unconditional love that a story can’t summarize. Forgiveness that is supernatural. Revitalized hearts that no one would expect. Commitment that is exceptional. Patience that cannot be explained.

Oh and….  vegetables will never compare to dessert.

No matter how hard you try to convince yourself that you can be happy with celery, carrots, and broccoli- that will always be a lie. Always.

So here’s to the next decade of my life. I’m excited to see what will change and what will stay the same. And what I’ll be able to say in 10 years, Lord-willing, about this last decade.

Oh dear. Now that IS depressing.  I’m off to find chocolate.